I just had a great conversation with my dear Sister-in-Christ – Angie at Laughter Does the Heart Good.    (This is a picture of us to the left — me cracking up at her as usual.  She is so much fun to be around.   I look like I’m in pain from laughing.)

Don’t you just love how God reveals Himself to you through the mouths of your friends?   If you don’t have those experiences, you might need some new friends!

As Angie and I talked, several great nuggets were dropped and I kept saying, “Oh girl, that is a blog post!”   One of these days Angie is going to write books and you will want to read some of the revelations God has given her.    With that said … I’ll share this:

Have you ever noticed someone who is desperate for acceptance?  Maybe they are desperate for approval.  No matter what they try, their desire seems to elude them.   They try to force doors to open through different measures, but the doors don’t open.

How easy is it for something to become an idol in our lives?

It is easier than you might expect.

Perhaps you have the desire to find a soul mate.  If that desire is greater than the desire to grow in your relationship with the Lord, then that desire can become an idol — it is that simple.  What fills your thought life?  What surfaces when you’re in pain?  Would “having a mate” fix your problem?  Or perhaps if you just had the right job — that’s it — the right job would solve everything.  No, only Jesus.   Spouses and jobs are good, but it is the condition of the heart that I’m discussing.

An example from my life.  For YEARS I wanted spiritual approval from someone in leadership.  (Even sharing that sounds so immature and ridiculous to me.  Sigh.)  All I wanted was a pat on the back — a crumb.  Just SOMETHING for cryin’ out loud!  Do you know what that led me to do?  S T R I V E.  Even if I was doing great things and even if God used them, the thought would often surface, “Did I do a good job?”  Just visualize a dog waiting for a crumb to fall — eyes full of great expectation.  I guess that was me.   Well, all of that striving gave me NOTHING but more disappointment and heartache.    I was the prayer coordinator — hungering to know I was doing SOMETHING right and when it was “prayer recognition” Sunday the microphone was given to the mission director to talk about missions.  HUH!?!?!?  Did I miss something?

SLAP! 

BAM! 

POW! 

That was the knock-out punch for sure.  She’s down folks … on the front row sobbing on her husband’s shoulder … one, two, three — YOU’RE OUT!

Yes, the very thing I craved eluded me.

What was it going to take to finally teach me?  Well, somehow over time God has brought some maturity in that area.  At least some I’m sure.  I had a pastor tell me the other day (he doesn’t read my blog so I don’t think I have to say this, but just in case:   I love you and I KNOW you didn’t mean anything by this):  “Your husband” (since I can’t use his name on here) is such a gift from God.  You are too, but “Boaz” is just special.   OUCH!  OK, ARROW IN HEART — REMOVAL ON AISLE TWO.  Sheesh!  Men!  They will hurt ya every time!  That is if you have your confidence and expectations in them.   Could the pastor have thought about what he was saying before he sent that email to me?  UH– yes.  Would his wife probably yank a knot in him for not being more sensitive?  Ha — yes!  Am I receiving rejection or offense from that statement:  NO!  Even though I now tease my husband that “heeeeeee” is a gift from God and oh yeah — I am too (lol), I am not offended or wounded.  Am I special and a gift from God?  Yes.  God loves me and I know the people who love me think I am special.   But years ago, I would have spent a lot of time trying to correct that statement.  Surely I could dance a little longer, sing a little louder, … something to get that “good job faithful servant” pat on the back.   I know now that I may never hear that from a person on earth, but as long as I hear it from my Abba Father in heaven — then that is enough for me.

Back to my conversation with Angie.  IF you find yourself seeing rejection everywhere you look, being ignored every time you speak, abused by each authority figure you encounter — SOMETHING IS THERE that needs to be healed and removed.    Sometimes our heads can be thick — not  hearing/seeing what God wants to show us.

It is always good to ask the Lord to shine His light into our lives and reveal anything hidden.   He is faithful to do it, but we need eyes to see and ears to hear.

God bless you all!